Question by imagine0218: Traveling over Christmas- how to deal with family?
My husband is deployed right now and will be coming home late November/early December ’08. He left for deployment training shortly after we are married in October. Last Christmas we spent the entire two weeks traveling between Ft. Bragg, Virginia (where we live) and the 2 locations in PA where our families lives. It was exhausting for both of us, and it was anything but relaxing for my husband, who said he refuses to do it this year. Here’s my thing. It’s not that he doesn’t want to see everyone when he comes home from deployment, but is it wrong for us to say, “Hey, we’re spending Christmas in Hawaii, alone, for a week, to get away from it all to to have some us time”? Since we’ve been married we seriously haven’t had any time to ourselves and the only time he’s been home his entire family has been around invading our privacy…seriously it’s like we’re dating. And since we’re taking a trip, is it wrong for us to skip exchanging presents? We’re not asking for presents
This will be our late honeymoon (since we couldn’t take one….Army sent him to training 3 days after the wedding)/ welcome home/ Christmas present to ourselves trip. And its probably the last thing we do before buying a house etc.
I’m not worried about my parents. They’re 110% supportive of our decision and always have been. I”m more worried about his family, and they’re the ones who guilt tripped us last year and caused us more stress into making an extra trip only to ignore us when we got there. They’re the ones who are less understanding. They’re also the ones who never visit. They’ll go all the way to NC, but they’ll never stop in VA. I’m more wondering how I deal with them. But yea I agree I shouldn’t feel guilty, I just want to know how to respond without flipping out on them and being a b*tch. =o)

Best answer:

Answer by sydjuliaddd
I think it would be a pity if you didn’t do exactly what you are talking about….Hawaii, etc.!! Go for it! You all both deserve that time alone definitely!

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